A true hate it or love it dish, nieuwe haring is not for everyone. This Dutch sashimi is a staple of our diet, and has been for many centuries. Nieuwe haring, also called maatjesharing and Hollandse Nieuwe, is herring from the Skagerrak (or thereabouts), conserved with salt and eaten with pickles.

That description alone can be quite enough for some viewers. Yep, raw fish indeed although the nastiest bits are removed on the fishing boat. Hollandse Nieuwe is then stored in small containers (vaatjes) and brought to shore. The first vaatje to land, some time in July, is traditionally auctioned off somewhere and it makes headline news.

Hollandse Nieuwe (herring) with pickles

The concoction has quite an -eh, shall I say intriguing, yes intriguing- aroma. Some folk like to top it off with raw onion, as if the scent isn’t overwhelming enough. Truth be told, haring tastes excellent, especially when enjoyed fresh from a stall (viskraam). It’s chock full of healthy omegas, too. Most often you would purchase them from the stall and eat the herring on the spot. You can either grab that sucker by the tail and lower it into your throat. Don’t worry, the head is chopped off. Usually though the vendor will dice the herring and give you a prikker (fork) to consume it.

So it turns out that what you saw in Pulp Fiction (see below) is true after all. Yes we do eat our fries with mayo and darn it we like them that way! Our mayo is a little less sour than yours probably, but the idea is the same. Eggs, vinegar and oil in an emulsion, mjum!

When you order fries in snack places, what you will get resembles the stuff in the photo below (with the exception that this is a sign, but you get the idea). Thick, golden fries with mayo. If you’re lucky, in a pointy bag like this. They usually come in a styrofoam cup.

A sign showing Flemish Fries

What’s Flemish about that? 

Well for starters these fries are not made from potato powder/substitute, but from actual potatoes. They are twice fried, as opposed to their ‘chips’ brothers in the UK. Twice fried? Yep, the raw potato slices are fried initially at 160C, cooled off, then fried again at 180 to give them more crispiness. The initial phase is done in the morning, the second frying happens ‘on demand’. This is why it often takes a couple of minutes to prepare your frietjes.

What’s Flemish about this, is that this is how the Flemish do it (you know, Belgians).

Varieties

Frietjes usually come in two or three sizes. Klein (small), middel (medium) or groot (large). So far, so good. When you don’t specify, you will get them plain (but salted). If you want mayo on them, and believe me, you do, order them met (with). You do not have to add “mayo”, because that is assumed. (We usually say mayonaise though.)

You have your other toppings like ketchup, curry and uitjes (diced onions) as well. A frietje with mayo, ketchup and onions is called speciaal (special). You can also usually order satésaus (peanut sauce). A frietje with mayo and satésaus is called oorlog (war). Mind you, these all have regional varieties too, but speciaal and oorlog are understood throughout the country. In the southern parts, you can include stew meat with your fries by ordering zuurvlees. In the central and northern parts of .nl this is called stoofvlees.

We don’t eat picallilly with fries. Eew.

Stroopwafels, literally syrup waffles, are made of two waffles (duh) with …. err you get the idea. They are produced in great amounts by small bakery shops and huge cookie factories alike. There are upscale versions but mostly stroopwafels are mass-produced, plastic-wrapped and supermarket-sold. These are all qualities a Dutchman likes since it means a low (i.e. “good”) price.

Kidding aside, stroopwafels are quite delicious and whenever I go abroad, I try to take a few packs with me since everybody loves them. Quite sweet, with a soft center and a crispy outside.

They usually come in packs of 10 and can be had for as little as €1,50 in budget supermarkets. Brand names are more expensive, but generally taste the same and are probably baked in the same factory anyway. A more classy version of the stroopwafel is produced fresh by small bakery shops. They are also sold in packs of 10, are fresher, but oddly this really doesn’t have a huge impact on the taste at all.

The upper end of the stroopwafel market is formed by street vendors who will bake the waffle on the spot and then fill it with the scorching hot sugary syrup. These vendors are most often found at markets: the famous Albert Cuyp market has one near the Van Woustraat. This is the best stroopwafel experience money can buy and often considerable lines will form in front of the stall. When you have the chance, I really do recommend you get one of these. It’s cheap, hot, absudly sweet and it seems universally liked.

Cheese is in every household in Nederland: it has been a very basic foodstuff for centuries. As you probably know, Nederland is one of the biggest dairy exporters on the planet. Our prototypical cows can be seen all across the country and supply a huge amount of milk daily (they’re inbred for their milk yield), supply manure for the crops and taste good as well (when grilled). It’s win-win-win, although they do produce a lot of methane.

Besides leaving the milk as-is or turning it into yoghurt we make cheese of it. Where the French have their Brie and Camembert, we have our Gouda. And just like the French cheeses, Gouda is named after a geographic area, a city in this case. You might think Gouda is a sort of open-air museum (especially if you’ve seen pictures of the cheese market) or some kind of industrial cheese factory. No, it’s nothing like that. Gouda is just a reasonably quiet city in the west of the country. Most cheese-making happens elsewhere, in the north of the country. Every part will have their own special variety, but all in all the Gouda type is pretty much the same.

It’s this Gouda (see pic above) that can be found in every refridgerator in Nederland. There are three basic varieties: jong (young), belegen (middle-aged) and oud (old). Young cheese tastes creamy, old cheese tastes hearty/salty. The really old stuff even has little crystals in it. In general, kids like young cheese better. Cheese can be bought in every supermarket and is often really cheap and really tasty.

Gouda deluxe

There are other varieties of Gouda as well; they are as common but not sold as much. There’s your boerenkaas (farmer’s cheese) which is made of raw milk instead of pasteurised milk and always comes directly from the farm. Boerenkaas is much tastier than normal Gouda and each brand is different. I am really not sure if it is safe for pregnant women or not; I have a hard time imagining anything from Nederland can be that dangerous, but it is made of raw milk after all. There’s also komijnenkaas: cheese with cummin seeds in it. Definitely an aquired taste, but still sold everywhere. There’s your goat’s cheese (white instead of yellow) and ‘luxury’ brands and low-fat cheeses with 20% fat contents. (Regular Gouda has up to 45%.)

All Gouda cheeses, when they are whole, are quite big, like a truck wheel. The cheese shop will cut these up for you on the spot. By some bizarre process, the salesperson invariably is able to cut off exactly the amount you wanted (or maybe 20 grams too much). Quite a feat considering young cheese is less dense and every kind of cheese is different in itself. You can also ask for the cheese to be sliced up (in plakjes). When you buy cheese from the supermarket, it’s already packaged in plastic; either whole or in slices.