Klompen come in super handy in wet, grassy lands with a risk of a cow stepping on your feet. Coincidentally, this is quite typical for Dutch soil. They are made from soft wood, typically willow, by hand. In ye olden days, klompen were the only shoe for country folk. You had your working clogs during the week and pretty clogs for Sundays. (More on Wikipedia.)

Dutch klompen

Quaintness aside, klompen can be a darned practical form of footwear. Indestructible (by bovine means at least), easy to wear, cool in summer and warm in winter. Walking in them takes a bit of practice, but can be learned by anyone. The secret is curling your toes when you take a step.

Touristic oddity

As one of the prototypical images of .nl (next to windmills and tulips), klompen are where tourists are. If you’ve ever visited this country, you have seen them. The klompen you have seen are not worn by anyone though–although definitely wearable, they are touristic oddities. Actual Nederlanders in need of klompen buy them in a local, usually nondescript, “ye olden klompen shoppe”.

Again, Dutch klompen

Should you go for the genuine cloggie experience, observe a few ground rules. Typically, the more decorated a klomp is, the less it is worn. All-black klompen are mens, to be worn on a Sunday. To church. Lacquered klompen heavily decorated by flowers are womens, to be worn on a Sunday. To church. Klompen with faux laces (a print or painted on) can be worn by anyone. White-wash klompen too, but usually indoors. Finally, the unpainted and cheapest klompen are worn in the field minding livestock.

Sure, lots of stores (mostly supermarkets) in other countries have coupons. But the amount of coupons in .nl is just way out there. For starters, every supermarket has ‘em. Some supermarkets offer a choice between coupons for purchase (koopzegeltjes) that have interest, and freebie zegeltjes. The freebie zegeltjes give you a discount on a next purchase. Then you have summer zegeltjes, EK zegeltjes, winterzegeltjes and who-knows-what zegeltjes.

Often you can combine these zegeltjes to end up at a lower (i.e. better) price.

Other times you collect zegeltjes and trade them in for products (i.e. cheap shit) or discount for something unrelated (e.g. amusement park).

Beware though for the special kinds of zegeltjes: they are ofen valid for a limited time, you need at least one zegeltjesboekje (coupon booklet) and you have to paste the coupons in the boekje a certain way. Case in point are Albert Heijn‘s zomerzegeltjes, that give you €5 discount but only for a completed booklet. Miss one zegeltje and the thing is worthless. One day over? Same.

Whatever happens, always accept the zegeltjes at the cash register. You might not want them, but the person coming after you does. Give your zegeltjes to him/her and say “alsjeblieft”.

But not only supermarkets offer zegeltjes, oh no. Gas stations, pharmacies, hairdressers, well just about any kind of retail environment really. But it does not end there. Many products have zegeltjes, such as Douwe Egbert’s coffee. The zegeltjes are printed on the package, you cut them out and put them in a jar. Every five years you have enough zegeltjes to cash in! Bring the jar to the Douwe Egberts store and cash them for ….. a nifty Douwe Egberts jar to collect zegeltjes! How brilliant!